Bayleaf - Skyclan Deputy
Anxiety was a feeling Bayleaf knew all too well. It swirled in the pit of his stomach. It felt like it always ate him from the inside out. As if he stood still long enough he would become a puddle of his own worries. The tom-cat couldn't help it. He oddly found comfort in his own anxiety. The world may always feel like it was collapsing, but the world might actual end if he didn't feel the gnawing in his chest. Bayleaf had always known himself to be an over-thinker. No matter what happened or what was said, the poor male would have to think over everything. He never aimed to be perfect, but Bayleaf never wanted to disappoint those he looked up to. Especially his leader.
Firestar always awed Bayleaf. Perhaps it was simply because he was his leader and most looked up to those in power. But, Bayleaf was deputy. He so happened to be Firestar's right hand and that in itself added to his anxiety. Bayleaf told himself over and over again not to question himself. He believed himself to be a good candidate for deputy. Firestar must have also believed that. It was no wonder why Bayleaf stood in the clearing of his clan waiting for the leader, but it felt so strange as well. For most warriors it would be a worry to be summoned by their leader, but Bayleaf was expected to be at the call of Fire.
He sniffled softly as he sat. His tail was wrapped firmly around himself in a comforting manner. Bayleaf was told the night before to wait on Firestar the next morning. That was easy for him. He was always naturally up early. He liked when there was no one around and he could simply get lost in his own thoughts. It was the waiting part that was hard for him. Was he doing something wrong? On his behalf, Bayleaf didn't have much experience in his new found position. Fire did throw him into it. His own whiskers twitched at that thought. It was selfish to think that way.
Bayleaf dug his claws into the dust. He finally pulled himself from his head and took in the appearance of Skyclan so early in the morning. It was a blissful feeling. The sun was just barely touching the ground. It made it appear to be much more darker than it actually was. Birds sung and bugs called to one another. Bay smiled to himself. It won't be so bad. He pulled his green eyes off of the clearing just in time to connect with the emerald and amber eyes of Firestar. He paled under his fur. Immediately, Bayleaf straightened his back and nervously licked his chaps.
"Good morning, Firestar. Hope it's started well for you."