Scorchedbones

His ears warmed at her voice, her words sticking to his heart like honey, he too had parts of him that wished that the memories that haunted her would have stayed gone he couldn't stand to see her so torn. Scorchedbones leaned down to rasp his tongue across her forehead, but before he made contact with her the molly retreated. His eyes widened as the molly began pleading with an unseen force, he just wanted to take away her pain he felt powerless. 

“Des-” He inched closer to the panicking molly, lowering himself to her level. “Desertrain its okay, i'm right here.” He tried to keep his voice low and calm, he didn't really know what was going on but he wanted to be there for her. He looked in her eyes, they were something he’d never seen before; it was like part of her mind was on a different plane of existence. 

“Come back to me Desertrain…”

The sudden rake across his cheek caused the tom to stumble backwards, not because it was particularly painful but because he wasn't expecting her to slash out. He could tell from the look on her face it wasn't intentional, something was haunting her, preventing her from living free. “It-its okey Des.” Scorchedbones wincing from the stinging in his cheek. 

“NO No no Desert dont go.” He howled as he watched the molly runaway. I can't let her leave again. Determined he pushed after her, she was always faster than him but he wasn't prepared to let her be alone right now. He felt his delicate heart breaking into pieces as he watched her fade from his sight line, he paw steps growing heavier as if something was preventing him from catching up. Scorchedbones couldn't remember the last time he cried but now they wouldn't stop flowing. His cheek mixed with salty tears and blood from his wound. His gaze locked on the direction Desertrain fled.

“Please dont leave me again….”

 Dez

Wayward Daughter of The Moorland

          Her eyes widened, processing his words. Why did she keep coming back? It was a question she had never dared to ask herself, too afraid of the answer she might find. For a moment, she looked away, her gaze distant, searching as she fought to untangle the chaos in her mind. She remained still, her brow furrowed in concentration before she slowly opened her mouth to speak. "I don't know," she finally confessed, her voice barely a whisper, as if the admission was dragged from her throat against her will. She had returned to Windclan, time and time again, even after everything. Why?

           As he pressed his head against her shoulder, she stiffened, freezing in place. She could feel the heat of his breath against her fur, his scent filling her nostrils. It was a scent she had once known intimately, a scent that had become synonymous with comfort and safety, evoking memories of happier times. Those days as a young apprentice were a distant memory now, though. "I miss.. how things used to be sometimes," she whispered, her voice barely audible, thick with emotion. "Being up in the mountains, it was... nice." A small, wistful smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. "Peaceful. Sometimes I wished my memories never came back, so I could have stayed." Her heart ached at the thought. She had been able to be herself again, before everything changed—before she changed.

           Then, as if struck by an invisible blow, she recoiled, her breath catching in her throat as a memory suddenly tore through her. The feeling of icy water filled her lungs, burning, searing, as her grandfather's claws dug into her small frame, holding her beneath the surface, again and again, until her vision swam and darkened at the edges. Pain exploded in her chest as her lungs screamed for air, a child's desperate, weakening struggles against an older, more skilled warrior’s brutal strength. The memory shifted, and suddenly she was back in that dark, dank den, huddled together with her sister, Cactusbloom, as they were tormented; powerless, helpless, and begging for a mercy that would never come.

           Shaking, her breath came in short, sharp gasps as she stumbled back, the past and present blurring together. "Stop," she choked out, her voice barely above a whisper, "Stop it, please.” Her eyes were wild and haunted, staring at something only she could see. A strangled cry escaped her lips, and before she knew what she was doing, Desertrain lashed out, her claws extended. She caught Scorchedbones across the cheek, a thin line of blood welling up before she stumbled back, her chest heaving with panicked breaths. The haze of the memory slowly lifted, and she shook her head violently, the horrific visions receding. She looked at Scorchedbones, her eyes wide and wild, a sheen of tears glistening in their icy depths. Her heart raced as the horror of what she had done sank in. She had hurt him, the one feline who had always shown her kindness, who had cared for her— and she had done so without even realizing it, lost in the horrors of her past.

           "I... I'm sorry," she choked out, her voice breaking. She couldn't bear to look at Scorchedbones, couldn't stand to see the hurt and confusion in his eyes. "I didn't...I didn't mean to..." she trailed off, unable to finish her sentence. Her heart was breaking, shattering into a million jagged pieces, but she had to be strong. She had to get away, had to run, before she hurt him again. A sob tore from her throat, and she turned away, unable to bear it any longer. Without another word, Desertrain turned and fled, disappearing into the undergrowth. She ran until her lungs burned and her paws ached, until the tears spilled down her cheeks and dried against her fur as she put as much distance between them as she possibly could.

Scorchedbones

“If you want me to leave so badly then why come back?” Scorchedbones voice tried its hardest to stay together but it was constantly shifting in pitch with his emotions. His body moving swiftly to and from as he paced in front of her, his mind racing. Scorchedbones knew deep down she must have a reason to constantly return to Windclan…to him she just was too strong to admit it or something was keeping her from doing so. 

His expression soft as he slowed his pacing, he couldn't bring himself to meet her gaze. Windclan was only meant to be temporary for him but when Desertrain saved him, his life became making sure he was able to do the same for her. He failed. She needed him and he didn't notice and now they were constantly being pulled apart. It couldn't help but feel he was partially responsible. A heavy sigh fell from the toms muzzle, 

“I have tried over and over again to forget you, forget the time we spent together and everytime I think things are finally going to be okay so that I can continue to be a good soldier for Windclan, you come marching right back into my life.” He knew he needed to make a decision, to follow Desertrain down her path, even if she didn't want him too or to turn his back on Desertrain, neither decision sat right with the tom cat. But, he wasnt the only one that needed to make a choice.

“If you want me out of your life so bad then leave.” His dead tone, it wasn't what he wanted but that was a choice she was going to have to make. 

“But I wouldnt change the way I feel about you for anything, Desertrain. I want you to keep interrupting my life.” He risked it, he knew getting physically closer to her could result in him loose and ear but it was worth it to him. His head burying into her shoulder, she could argue with him all day long but being connected to her in this moment he could feel it, she was still the same Desertrain he grew fond of. 

“I'm not perfect myself either Des, you don't know anything about my past, it's an ugly side of myself I didn’t want you to see.” His voice was quiet, ashamed of his origins. The dark pelted tom pulled his head from her shoulder, stepping back only slightly to give the molly her space. “More than anything I respect you, and your feelings. If you want me to disappear I will.” 

“But if you allow me Desertrain, I don't want this to be the last time I see you. At the end of the day you’re my friend, if it wasn't for you who knows where I would have ended up.” His eyes desparely pleading with the molly

Desertrain

           As his dark form loomed over her, she swallowed hard, her throat suddenly dry. She hadn't expected him to be so forward, so bold, and for a moment, she found herself at a loss for words. Staring at him, her icy facade cracked and thawed, a glimpse of the old Desertrain shining through—soft and vulnerable, a far cry from the twisted version of herself.

           "Yours?" she echoed softly, her gaze flickering between his eyes, drinking in the raw emotion she found there. His words stirred something within her, a bittersweet ache that she thought she had long buried. For a moment, just a fraction of a heartbeat, she allowed herself to imagine a different life— a life where she could have considered a future with him by her side, of kits with his dark fur and bi-colored eyes.

           But then reality came crashing back down, and with it, the weight of her sins. She was a killer, a traitor, a monster— and Scorchedbones deserved so much better than that. He deserved a normal life, a chance at happiness— and Desertrain couldn't give him that. She had ruined any chance of a future with Scorchedbones when she used him for her own selfish gains. She didn't deserve his loyalty, his love. It would only end in more heartache, more destruction.

           She shook her head sharply, dispelling the fantasy. "No," she said firmly, her claws extending and retracting nervously against the ground, "Don't be ridiculous," she spat, her voice sharp as a whip. A muscle twitched in her jaw as she fought to maintain her composure. "You don't know what you're asking for," she warned, her eyes flashing a wild, feral and desperate light. "You don't know who I am. You never knew me; not the real me. You knew the fabricated version of myself I constructed to manipulate everyone, including you." Her words were laced with a cruel and bitter truth, a confession that tore at her very core. She looked away, her gaze distant, haunted. "I'm not someone you should follow, Scorchedbones. I'm not someone you should trust."

           Her heart ached, a dull throb in her chest. She took a step back, needing distance, needing air. "Just go," she said, her tone sharp, almost cruel. She could feel the sting of tears, hot and shameful, pricking at the corners of her eyes, but she blinked them back, refusing to let them fall. "Go back to Windclan," she hissed, her eyes blazing with a cold, merciless light. She knew she was pushing him away, knew it was selfish, but she couldn't bear the thought of him suffering more because of her. She had to push him away, for his own good. It was better this way, for both of them.

Scorchedbones

Windclan Warrior

A chuckle always escaped his muzzle at her words, he was surprised she doubted him after all it was clear of his feelings for the molly, even now after everything, it was still obvious the emotions that he felt just being in her presence. “Of course I'd be concerned about you, Deserstrain. You hurt me but I feel like I'm not the only one hurting. ” His head cocking to the side. There has to be some reason Desertrain kept returning to Windclan, whether she was willing to admit it or not. He took her moving closer to him as a sign that he could approach her more without her turning tail and running. His long strides bring him almost nose to nose with her swiftly. 

“Well you’re right about one thing, I am loyal to a Desert….” Chewing on the inside of his cheek, a metallic tang lingering in his mouth, while he was in Windclan he wanted to be the perfect warrior but he couldn't when his mind was constantly elsewhere. 

“But I never said it was Desertstar.” Technically he was loyal to Desertstar and he would be unless he was ordered otherwise. To say that old habits die hard would be an understatement, once a grunt always a grunt. He joined Windclan at the recommendation of Desertrain. To him, she was his reason for fighting for Windclan, he would have followed her if she had ordered him too in the beginning. The tall dark pelted smirked at the pale she cat, his head lower as the rest of his front half following bowing at the molly. An excitement glazed over his bi colored eyes. 

“Say the word Desertrain, and I am all yours.”

Desertrain

        The mention of her mother only served to deepen the chill in her gaze, a flicker of anger sparking in their icy depths before she quickly smothered it beneath a mask of indifference. Her tail lashed once, twice, before stilling. "Safe?" she echoed, nearly scoffing, "I suppose I am, in a manner of speaking." Her gaze bore into his, searching for any sign of deception, any hint of ulterior motives. "Surprised you even care after everything I did to you,“ she took a step closer to him, her small frame tense and coiled like a spring ready to snap. She wanted to believe in his concern, in his care, but the wounds of her past were still raw and bleeding. Trust was a dangerous thing, though, easily shattered, and Desertrain had learned the hard way just how painful it could be to place her faith in others.

           She tilted her head, studying Scorchedbones with a critical eye. He looked well, his dark pelt sleek and glossy, his eyes bright. A pang of something—regret, perhaps, or longing—twisted in her gut. "And how are you?" she asked, arching a delicate brow. "Still playing the loyal subject to my mother, I presume? How very...quaint,” she quietly seethed, her words barbed— and even though bitterness dripped from them like venom, there was a brittleness to her tone, a hairline fracture in her composure. It was as if she was trying to find reasons to push him away, to keep him at a distance. Doing her best to convince herself as much as him that the old Desertrain was completely gone.

Scorchedbones

Windclan Warrior

The last thing Scorchedbones expected on his patrol was the ever elusive Desertrain. It seemed that every time he had her back in his paws she would leave him again. He wished her image would no longer linger in his mind but her claws were still dug into him. Her pale golden pelt was now once again blessing his presence, he felt a small flicker in his heart. Scorchedbones momentarily hoped the world around them would freeze and the two of them could live frozen in this moment forever. 

The lump in his throat hurt as he swallowed, he knew he needed to say something, anything he just needed to talk to her again. 

“Des-”

His eyes even after everything they had been through were kind, staring down at the molly. His voice was almost breathless at first. Scorchedbones was scared to say anything more, knowing one wrong word and she’d be gone from him once again. His gaze finally broke away from hers, seeing the ice accompanying her gaze was all the verification he needed. It was true her memories truly had returned.

Scorchedbones knew he needed to put on a brave face, no matter what he was feeling about Desertrain at the moment he was loyal to Desertstar and he needed to act like it. “Yes, thanks to your mothers guidance we were able to return home.” Secretly hoping mentioning her mother might spark some feelings back to Desertrain.

“I-um I hope you were able to return home safely.” Despite her choosing Renly it didn't mean he wanted anything bad to happen to the molly. 

His bi colored eyes still revealing his true emotions, he couldn't help wanting his friend back. 

“...Are you safe?”